that Sarah Klem

I used to blog as the Devil. Then I was Tatiana. Now, I'm just me.

Gone Girl: A Lesson for the Dudes

I just finished Gone Girl. I know, it’s not 2012, but I have a lot of books on my bedside and to be frank, this wouldn’t have climbed to the top of the pile so quickly if the movie trailer didn’t look so damn good. So, be thankful. Because you could be reading this in 2016 at the speed I read multiplied by the rate I push books to the top.

I mostly enjoyed the book (the ending has a lot of holes that just make me sad for Nick, but not really because he is a bit of an ass), however one thought did keep running through my head while I was reading it – should Nick have seen this coming?

Someone I follow on Twitter commented that the movie struck a little too close to home for him since he remembered what is was like when his girlfriend of many years did a complete 180, seemingly overnight.

And while I didn’t do it on Twitter, I will do it here: I call bullshit.

A person can pretend to be someone they aren’t for a few dates, even a few months (hell, some dating books even recommend it). But no one can completely hide who they really are. There are always cracks in the veneer, always signs you are sleeping next to a crazy person – you just choose to ignore them because she is hot or good in bed or laughs at all your jokes or is in every other way but that one thing that always gives you the heebie-jeebies, but, hey, no one is perfect, right?

For instance, Gone Girl (Oh, crap. If anyone reading this is even farther behind on their reading list than I am – this might get spoiler-ish): Second-Half-Amy admits she started to crack under the pressure of playing the cool girl way before they married or moved to Missouri. But, pretending Nick didn’t notice the attitude change or didn’t understand why he was no longer sleeping next to the coolest girl ever, there was a big, fat, bright red flag waving in his pretty little face and not only did he see it, he mentions it half a dozen times in the first half of the book: Amy had no female friends.

According to First-Half-Nick, that was just because all other women were jealous of her and/or obsessed with her.

Seriously, Nick?

To the six single dudes who read this blog, if you take nothing else away from my ramblings, please remember, if you are with a woman and she says, “I don’t have any female friends.” I’m telling you, there is something wrong with her.

See, women aren’t clouded by their desire to bone your new girlfriend, so they are better judges of character at this moment than you are. I swear. Also, women aren’t nearly as petty or as jealous as the media and crazy women would have you believe.

See what I did there?

See what I did there?

So, if you find yourself being lured by the hot girl with the amazing body who twirls her hair around her finger, shrugs her shoulder and says, “I hang out mostly with guys. Most girls are jealous of how pretty I am and so I find it really hard to make friends with chicks.” Remember:

Even Cameron Diaz has friends.

True story.