Tatiana Talks

Unemployment Diaries -- Day 12

So, now that my claim has been filed, my last column written and most of my friends have been notified, I am beginning to settle into some sort of routine -- well at least I am sleeping again.

At first, my biggest fear was that I wouldn’t have the discipline to make this work. That I would spend my days either on my couch or in my bed, sleeping or watching TV or eating, but not writing. I discussed this fear, briefly with Bridie the other night when she was over. I reasoned that the fact that I am not doing anything else was reason enough to get out of bed in the morning and get my butt in gear. Of course, I only half believed her when I said it.

I remember back in the day when MTV still played music videos, okay, maybe not that far back, but at the very least music-related programming was still the channel’s mainstay, there was an interview with Snoop Dogg. He was offering advice to kids out there that wanted to be a chart-topping rap artists and world-class pimps. He said he never had a back-up, forcing him to become a successful rapper.

I realized the morning after Bridie was over to drink wine and discuss our lives, after the hangover subsided, that the past 12 years of my life have been my back-up plan. I am finally working on my dream. So while, it is sometimes hard to turn off USA, especially when they have back-to-back Law and Order SVU’s, I do. Because there are no excuses and if I don’t get this done, well, then I very well could be homeless or, worse, back to living with my parents in Allentown.

I also find that I enjoy the weekends more. Not because I can finally see my friends again, though that does rock too, but because I can let myself off the hook. It is tough being both the boss and the employee. But on Saturday and Sunday, I am just me. This past Saturday, I stayed in bed until noon, something I haven’t done in at least a year. And then I got up and was productive and had an awesome day, and I realized that it wasn’t just because it was Saturday and nice out. But because for the first time in 12 years I didn’t feel guilty that I wasn’t sitting at my computer getting some writing done.

So, Snoop, if you are out there reading this (and I am sure you are), thanks. If it weren’t for you I might have a real dog now -- I once read somewhere that having a dog helps you keep a routine as there is no sleeping in when the pooch has to pee.

For those of you that are just checking in for the best locations for Internet access -- the Starbucks at Broad and Jackson has free wireless, though it is kinda slow (still faster than the Borders at Broad and Chestnut), but only a couple of outlets and really large windows that make it really sunny and hard to see your computer.

And for those of you that just learned I am blogging again and are reading this in hopes that I will fail miserably, well, this entry isn’t going to make you happy, but stay tuned. I am sure it won’t all be roses and daisies.